SHOW NOT TELL

You may have heard of this term. But what does it mean?
As fiction writers, we create an imaginary world, with imaginary characters and imaginary plots. And the key word here is: IMAGINE.
Legendary BBC Broadcaster Alistair Cooke once said “I prefer radio because the pictures are better.”
Clearly, Alistair was of the opinion that, using words to fire up listener’s imaginations can tell a better story.

There’s perhaps no better example than the featured image on this post: “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.” – Anton Chekhov.
Isn’t that a beautiful phrase? And doesn’t that create a better image in your head, which also, possibly, raises a questions: why is the glass broken? What are we doing her during the night?

Here’s another example: “Emma was sad.” Okay. It’s short, to the point. She’s sad. But sadness is an emotion, so why not instil some emotion, some sharing of Emma’s emotion, with the reader? Enjoyment of stories is much better if the reader can imagine themselves as one of the characters. “Emma was quiet. I looked across at her, seeing her face blank, tears forming in her eyes.”

You can show so much about a character’s internal status and demeanour by body language and facial expression. They don’t need to tell us how they’re feeling at this particular time – we can see!

You can also show a character’s mood through their dialogue, and how they say things. Compare these two lines: 

Her eyes lifted to look at his face, showing pain, anguish, even fear. “It’s not right,” he whispered.

Her eyes lifted to look at his face, showing pain, anguish, even fear. “It’s not right!” he bellowed.

Okay. Let’s try one of these ourselves. Take the view you have, or a view through a window. “I can see a tree in the sunshine. There’s a breeze.” That’s a bit boring, isn’t it?
“The silver birch outside my window bent, lazily, its branches flicking in every direction. Harsh midday sunlight reflected off its bark, forcing me to look away.” It’s a bit more ‘wordy’, and it’s a much better picture I’m creating.

You can show seasons: “Deep snow lay like a puff-white blanket in the garden” (winter); “The smell of fresh-cut grass wafted in through the open window for the first time this year” (spring); “In the distance, I can hear children’s excited voices as they cool off in the city-centre fountains” (summer); “Dried leaves crackle and branches snap underfoot” (autumn). I’m sure you could do better – these are ones I just made up now.

Have a look at something you’ve written recently. Is there a way to enhance the storytelling by showing, not telling?